Recently, I reported my suspicion that the editors of the world were colluding to drive me crazy. After another week of waiting and a query letter (who knew those things worked?!) I got a response from the editors of Nine. They want my story, “Orc Legal” for their second issue.
This isn’t my third and final pro-level sell to make the SFWA, yet and still I’m very excited about this one. First is because I believe Orc Legal to be one of the funniest, if not the funniest story I’ve ever written and it deserved a decent home despite market aversions to humor. Second, Nine: A Journal of Imaginative Fiction pays something I’ve never gotten paid: royalties.
On top of the standard flat rate, Nine is paying me 9% of all profits from the sell of Issue #2. Getting royalties marks another writer milestone for me, one where my spending cash is directly tied to how well a publication does. I’m all like “Go Nine!” (I even pronounce the italics). Meanwhile, I’m rubbing my hands together, envisioning an endless parade of coins with legs marching behind a dollar sign, all of them strutting blindly off a plank into my Scrooge McDuck style money pen. Here’s your new home my shinies.
At 5 bucks an issue, I don’t expect to pop bottles on my private jet as it’s headed back to the States all thanks to Nine #2. Still, if something is left to wonder, I’m that cat that’ll go off wondering, the optimist who’s keeping hope alive that thunderstorm sized electricity will buzz about Nine #2′s awesomeness. Plus at 5 bucks an issue, I know you guys subscribing are raring to see what I believe is my funniest story to date.
Stay tuned for updates on when it hits the market. And after you check me out, go tell ninety million of your closest friends.

Congrats James! Put me down for a copy!
And Happy Memorial Day! On behalf of the Nilsen Family of Walkersville, MD, we salute you and all of our troops!
gotta bow in the presence of greatness. My dude defines success through quality material, excellent writing, and persistence.
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